self-portraits in presence

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This new series is made up of self-portraits created in the present moment. Each piece reflects the rhythms, challenges, and unique sense of time that come with living in a disabled, neurodivergent body. Once the work is stretched onto canvas, it becomes something more than what my body alone could achieve. Through focused making, repeated marks, and getting lost in the craft, I find a way to move beyond the limits of my physical self.

My knitted textile abstractions develop much more slowly than my earlier acrylic paintings. Acrylic painting required me to work quickly before the paint dried, but knitting forces me to slow down. I choose this slower process on purpose, as a way to resist doing things as quickly as possible. As a disabled person, I know that we often need not just more time, but a different way of experiencing time. Living with autism and chronic illness means dealing with time in ways that don’t match the usual pace of the world, and constantly facing barriers I can’t control. By making art that can only be created through patience and slowness, I push back against these expectations.

On top of everything else, chronic illness brings constant, unseen work like doctor visits, tests, and medications. My body is always under medical routines, which can be tiring and make me feel disconnected, especially since hospitals and clinics often feel cold and impersonal. To counter this, I use bright colors in my knitting to bring back joy and a sense of humanity. Unlike the controlled, sterile look of medical spaces, my work is meant to invite touch, encourage slowing down, and offer rest.